I really tried my best, but I failed yet again. I really cannot end my day without sms-ing him to just let him know that I've always have him in my mind and in my heart.

I was at ECP BK just now with sister and I heard "You'll be safe here" over their radio. Tell me how can I not breakdown?

As much as I don't want Mama to know anything about this, she already know. I don't know how but yes, she knew. She even told me she dreamt of me asking my sister to buy a box of chocolate and pass it over to Muhammad Firdaus. Which yes, I did just that and it happens before Mama told me she dreamt of it. I really cannot hide anything from my Mama.

"Don't regret over it. It happens for a reason. At least this happened cause if it don't, you'll never learn anything from your mistake."

All of my friends ask me to be strong and that they know and understand how I feel. But they don't feel what I feel. Thank you all but I'm sorry, I am not strong.

But I will wait just to have him by my side. I will wait for Muhammad Firdaus, even if it kills me. Cause I believe in love. I believe that our love is true.

Please break the silence soon.